Thursday, July 08, 2004

Alex's Little Secret

Okay, so we were planning on taking Alex swimming. There's this wonderful invention called the "swimming diaper" that you buy to take your little darling into the pool, so their diaper does not blow up like an Oompa-Loompa as it tries to soak up the entire pool into its patented "gel coating". I don't understand the technology behind them, but they are usually a requirement at most pools if your child is not potty-trained. I suppose they don't want to keep refilling the pool. Anyway...

I saw some Lil' Swimmers diapers at Target and grabbed a package. I was shocked by the price - $7.99 for 12 diapers - but hey, they were required, so I bought them.

They sat on the changing table shelf for about a month until we got around to taking Alex swimming (this past July 4th weekend). We excitedly got out several of his swimsuits (yes, he has more than one), had him model each one and decided on the one that didn't slip down to his ankles when he exhaled. Then we opened the package of Lil' Swimmers and....OMIGOD!

We were surprised to find that the diapers were mostly HOT PINK! ...with the Little Mermaid on it! ...right smack-dab across Alex's rear, in her full pink and green mermaidenly glory.

Okay, hold on one damn minute here! No one told me that swimming diapers were sold in "girl" and "boy" varieties! There was no warning on the package! I don't even remember it saying "Little Mermaid"! That might have tipped me off that something was amiss! Even so, aren't there cute little BOY crabs and that cool singing lobster dude? Are they hot pink? NO!
See the abuse I have to take from these people!
Luckily, "Alex's little secret" was easily hidden under his manly (toddler-y?), blue and green surfer-type swimming trunks. Every once in a while, a little bit of pink would appear from under his waistband and we would quickly look around for onlookers, then gently tuck it back in.

Shhhhhh...don't tell anyone Alex's little secret! He's got 11 more of these damn things to wear before we can buy new ones.


At July 15, 2004 at 7:26 AM, Blogger Cagey said...

That's it. You've done it now - he's scarred. No college for him as he'll have to now finance his therapy.


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